Searching for Love.......

Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep... wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you're just as beautiful first thing in the morning. One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky his is to have you.... The one who turns to his friends and says, 'that's the one'.

Love is elusive, but not unattainable. Love is Patient, and so we must also be patient for Love.

And so I wait...........

“Being defeated is often a temporary condition. Giving up is what makes it permanent.”

“Being defeated is often a temporary condition. Giving up is what makes it permanent.”

I have often pondered this quote and reminded myself that I should never give up when pursuing anything of worth. But then I question the actual worth of what I am pursuing. Is it a worthy pursuit? Or a futile one?

When does my own stubbornness overshadow my objectivity? Often I fear. But how do I measure those pursuits objectively? Can I? Do I?

I often feel defeated, but still do not give up. Is it only to avoid a different approach, or something altogether different or previously avoided?

Often I am faced with situations, or choices that have no clear, rational solution. Where a decision has to be made and there is no "right" answer. Often I chose the answer that was "right" for me at the time. But times change......should my answer change accordingly?

Options, the world has brought us to a time where we have many. Too many sometimes.

This is when I wonder if "one-payer" healthcare will cover my therapy, lol.

US state approves guns in bars - WTF???

US state approves guns in bars
NASHVILLE (Tennessee) - HANDGUNS will soon be allowed in bars and restaurants in Tennessee under a new law passed by state legislators who voted to override the governor's veto.
The legislation that takes effect July 14 retains an existing ban on consuming alcohol while carrying a handgun, and restaurant owners can still opt to ban weapons from their establishments.
Thirty-seven other states have similar laws. The state Senate voted 21-9 on Thursday against Democratic Gov. Phil Bredesen's veto, a day after the House also voted 69-27 to override.
They overrode critics, including Bredesen, who said it's a bad idea to have guns and alcohol in close proximity.
Democratic Sen. Doug Jackson, the main sponsor of the bill, said state Safety Department records show handgun permit holders in Tennessee are responsible.
Of the roughly 218,000 handgun permit holders in Tennessee, 278 had their permits revoked last year, records show. Since 2005, state records shows nearly 1,200 people have lost their permits.
Revocations are issued for felony convictions, while permits can be suspended for pending criminal charges or for court orders of protection.
Sen. Andy Berke was the only senator to speak against overriding the veto on Thursday. 'I believe that we should follow the governor and rethink what we have done,' he said.
The law, which was supported by the National Rifle Association, has been successful in other states, its chief lobbyist said. 'Of those 37 states, not one state has attempted to repeal or amend those statutes because they've been successful,' Chris Cox said.
Bredesen spokesman Lydia Lenker said after Wednesday's House vote that the Democratic governor expected an override when he vetoed the legislation last week. -- AP

If I had only played the piano

I had considered this as the title to my auto biography, and assuming I live long enough to write one, it may still be. But for now, you get the short story chapter version.........

One of my first memories as a child was living in Elgin Illinois, in a house I thought was huge. The last time I saw the house, a few years ago, which is 35-40 years later, it is anyting but huge.

When you first entered the house, there was a small screened in porch, big enough for 2 people and a milkbox. For those of you too young to know what a milkbox is, try google, it is a wonderful thing.

The next room was the dining room, big enough for a table to sit 6, and maybe a small buffet.
Beyond that was the kitchen. Small but funtional. In the back of the kitchen was the stairs to the basement. A story in itself, for a later time.

To the left of the dining room was, well, another dining room with the master bedroom off of that. Next was the living room. And across to the far wall was the other enterance, and the stairs leading up to the other 3 bedrooms, and bathroom.

Now add to this, my grandmother, her husband (fiance?) My mother and I, 3 of my school age aunts, my uncle, and my great-grandfather. Nine of us in total, but being the baby of the bunch, it never seemed crowded to me.

Back to the diningroom ajacent the living room. Other than the dining table, the other more spectacular item in the room was a piano. I was way too young to be interested in it, and I cannot really recall hearing it being played much. What I do remember was being repeatedly told to not touch it. It smudged easily, and With 9 people in the house, a can of Pledge was most likely a luxury. But then again, I was 3 or 4 years old.

From 2nd to 7th grade we lived in Carpentersville, and again there was a piano in hour home. And my Mother played it. And again, I was repeated told to not touch it. It smudged easily, and at the age I was then, it was also very breakable I am sure.

When we moved again to the house my Mother still lives in, there again, was a piano that my Mother played. By this time I had allowed its presence to blur into the other things in and about the house that my brain had to diminished to mere "background".

Years after I had moved out of the house, out of state, and far from the thoughts of that piano, Mom sold it. When she told me I was sad.

Sad that I wouldn't hear her play it again, only realizing how much I had enjoyed it, and how I probably never told her that.

Sad that a piece of my life's "background" was now gone.

But mostly sad, when I realized I had never learned to play it. Never known the joy and fulfilment which I am certain comes with that ability.

But what helps that sadness subside, is when I close my eyes and think back, and I can see and hear Mom sitting at the piano. And there is no room or reason for sadness there.

Thanks Mom

It's Okay

One of many things that I have become good at is avoidance.

I avoided a phone call yesterday from a very close friend. Not his fault, all me.

I didn't even listen to the message until today while I was walking back from the mailbox.
Still no check.

The beginning of the message was thinly veiled as a "in case you lost my number,
here it is again" message, to alleviate any 'reason' I could have to not call him back-(thank you).

But he went on with reserved elation in his voice, saying that alot of good things were happening, and he wanted to tell me about them.

But it was the end of the message that flipped a switch in my head.

He concluded his message with a reminder of the fact that he will be leaving, moving on, becoming the best him- very soon.
So, I better hurry.......

For a while now, weeks, months, years, depending on who you ask, there have been more than enough reasons for me to do something that I have mastered avoidance of.

There was always a "reason" "rationale" or "better option" that to do that.
Bottom line, it was NOT okay.

So, hearing him say in his message, that he was leaving soon, and wanted to talk to me, all I could think was...it IS Okay.

It is probably alot more than just Okay, but it still clicked.

It is Okay.

But some of my best friends are........

"If a black man from Chicago was taught to stand far away from gay people because he didn't want to be accused of being gay. What would happen if he'd run into a gay man? What's the talk? What would he learn, what would I learn? I learned that people in Chicago were wrong and I had been an asshole all along."
--Kanye West on homophobia

***

I have been blessed most of my life with having no outward or apparent prejudices towards any particular person, or group of people. In high school all the "jocks" viewed me as a "freak" that was tolerable, and the "freaks" viewed me as a "jock" that was tolerable. In truth I was neither a "freak" (100% drug free and happy about it, in high school) nor was I a "jock" (One day on the tennis team, one week in track-but I DID finish the mile, lol).

I was lucky, because I was able to "be-friend" or at least interact with people from "both sides". I may not have fit the mold, or even remotely agreed with where they were coming from, but I was still able to see them for what they where, are......people.

I have come across situation similar to high school throughout my life. I remember moving from Carpentersville, to Lake in the Hills, my 2nd week of 7th grade. New school, new people, none of whom I knew. My first class, someone actually said hello to me, not the other way around. A "jock", as it were, but none the less, he saw "just another person" in class to say Hi to. We were never close in school, but it still left an impression (Thank You Todd Thomas, wherever you are).

Don't get me wrong, there were alot of people in high school that saw me as neutral at best, and therefore tolerable as a human being. Not people that I considered friends, per se, but people that had the ability (aware of it or not) to be friendly even though they were not "friends".

In high school there were people like Vince Amandes, Bill Baruth, Andrea Di Pascua (sp.), etc, and I could go on for quite a while here........but you get it. People who saw beyond themselves and the cliques they had been absorbed into, at least even to say "hi" as you passed in the hallway.

People who needed no motive or reason to say hello, it was just a part of who they were as individuals, seperate from the pack.

Often I remind myself, as I walk through a mall, or am in line at the store, to flash back to that time, and turn to the person in line behind me and say Hello.

Amazing what affect that canhave on a person, usually both.

Try it sometime -

Best advice I have gotten this week

In my daily ritual of reading some of my fellow bloggers blogs, I often stumble across something I "keep".

Whether it be as a word document in one of way too many files on my computer, or as an indelible mark upon my consciousness, here is this weeks........(Thanks Davey!- his words in red)

We only have a few short years on this planet, so it certainly behooves us to enjoy and cherish every last second of this life. Here are my tips for doing just that:

1.Anyone can see the future, but it takes a true wizard to see the present moment. Don’t spend your present dwelling on the past or dreaming of the future - nothing is promised. Live!

2.Walk barefoot.

3.Change yourself, not others. If you don’t like or can’t accept what you see in others, change yourself.

4.Take your ego out of your relationships. Without ego, jealousy will never find its footing.

5.Eat ice cream.

6.Take time to love yourself. As you learn to love yourself, you’ll find it much easier to love others.

7.Read good books. I’d recommend The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success.

8.Eat whipped cream and strawberries off of someone’s bum at least once.

9.Don’t do the things you don’t like. Seriously. If you hate your job, quit. Seriously. Life is way too short, man.

10.Love the times when you are single.

11.Love the times when you are partnered.

12.Instead of regretting your "mistakes", learn from them. It’s much more productive.

13.Don’t struggle against the universe. You only need oars if you’re fighting the current.

14.Drop the soap.

15.Work to create a more loving tomorrow, but accept the world as it is today.

16.Be inappropriate at least once a day.

17.Express gratitude.

18.Smile at strangers. Sometimes, they’ll smile back.

19.Throw out these rules and make your own.

Thanks again Davey, for reminding me that we each have our own life, to live.

The Rest of the Story - Thank You Paul

Lust is easy. Love is hard. Like is most important. ~Carl Reiner

I found this observation very interesting. I asked myself, what do I like, love, and/or lust over?

Yes, that is ALOT to wrap my head around.

This could take a while, so more on that later.

On a sadder note....Paul Harvey has finished "the rest of the story".
http://www.abcrn.com/harvey/

When I was much much younger I remember hearing his radio shows and was always hooked into waiting for the "rest of the story". The stories always started off "normal" enough, but then there would be a twist, or flaw in the story and I would have to "stay tuned" if I wanted to know "the rest of the story".

Life is like that too. We gather our knowledge and experience and once we think we "know it all" we attempt to apply it to our lives. Most often we do not wait for "the rest of the story" and find ourselves lost, confused, or at the very least, frustrated.

We are bombarded daily with sound bytes, dramatic headlines, gossip, and new information that we somehow have to try to digest and make sense of. Our "drive-thru" mentality has made us a country of "I want it, and I want it NOW!" consumers. We buy the next big thing whether we really need it or not. We bitch about gas prices as we fill up our SUV so we can drive to the corner store. We gang up against politicians & celebrities that get accused of anything we can fight against based on only a headline or sound byte we saw on Entertainment Tonight, or TMZ.

We have lost our patience to wait for "the rest of the story".

In my personal history there is ALOT of stuff that at first sight would make me out to be a monster. BUT if you wait and listen to "the rest of the story" you will find that I am not a bad guy at all.

I will miss Paul Harvey, although I have not heard any of his stories in years. The mystery, the hope, the anticipation he conveyed is what we all experience every day in our everyday lives.

So the next time you are ready to jump on the judgement bandwagon, remember Paul Harvey, and be sure you have "the rest of the story"

It is Sunday, the temperature is dropping, and I have spent most of the day recovering from karaoke last night.
But, in an effort to keep my brain active and healthy I felt the need to educate myself in areas previously unknown.

Here is what I have learned........

•A rat can last longer without water than a camel.
•Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks or it will digest itself.
•The dot over the letter "i" is called a tittle.
•A raisin dropped in a glass of fresh champagne will bounce up and down continuously from the bottom of the glass to the top.
•A female ferret will die if it goes into heat and cannot find a mate. I know some people like that!
•A duck's quack doesn't echo. No one knows why.
•A 2 X 4 is really 1-1/2 by 3-1/2. I kind of figures as much
•During the chariot scene in "Ben Hur," a small red car can be seen in the distance.
•On average, 12 newborns will be given to the wrong parents daily! That explains it!
•Donald Duck comics were banned from Finland because he doesn't wear pants.
•Because metal was scarce, the Oscars given out during World War II were made of wood.
•The number of possible ways of playing the first four moves per side in a game of chess is 318,979,564,000.
•There are no words in the dictionary that rhyme with orange, purple and silver.
•The name Wendy was made up for the book "Peter Pan." There was never a recorded Wendy before. This I found Amazing!
•The very first bomb dropped by the Allies on Berlin in World War II killed the only elephant in the Berlin Zoo.
•If one places a tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion, it will instantly go mad and sting itself to death.
•Bruce Lee was so fast that they actually had to s-l-o-w film down so you could see his moves.
•The first CD pressed in the US was Bruce Springsteen's "Born in the USA."
•The original name for butterfly was flutterby.
•The phrase "rule of thumb" is derived from an old English law which stated that you couldn't beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb.
•The first product Motorola started to develop was a record player for automobiles. At that time, the most known player on the market was the Victrola, so they called
themselves Motorola.
•Roses may be red, but violets are indeed violet. Oh the horror of having to re-write all that poetry!
•By raising your legs slowly and laying on your back, you cannot sink into quicksand.
•Celery has negative calories. It takes more calories to eat a piece of celery than the celery has in it to begin with.
•Charlie Chaplin once won third prize in a Charlie Chaplin look-alike contest.
•Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying.
•Sherlock Holmes NEVER said "Elementary, my dear Watson." Say it isn't true!
•An old law in Bellingham, Washington, made it illegal for a woman to take more than 3 steps backwards while dancing.
•The glue on Israeli postage is certified kosher.
•The Guinness Book of Records holds the record for being the book most often stolen from Public Libraries.
•Astronauts are not allowed to eat beans before they go into space because passing wind in a spacesuit damages them. Not to mention the other drawback.
•Bats always turn left when exiting a cave- because they just ain't right?

It is my hope that I have somehow enlightened you on this glorious Sunday.

Rest assured that tomorrow is Monday.......

I am going to die today, and tomorrow too

While doing my daily blogroll reading, I came across an entry in http://www.breaktheillusion.com/?p=1412 regarding death. It's okay, you can keep reading.

Read what my buddy Davey wrote, it is not Terminal, lol- go ahead........I'll wait.......


***

After reading this, and the responses that followed, one in particular grabbed me----

I’m a medical student and while on the floor today, we had a patient that has
been diagnosed with Stage III Osteosarcoma transferred to our hospital. When I
walked into the room to get a history and physical the first thing she said to
me was, “I’m dying.” Taken back and with confusion on how to respond I light
heartedly said, “well, aren’t we all?” We both laugh and then she asked me,
“Well are you okay with that? (long pause while I’m in deep contemplation)
Because I am.”
All day I’ve been thinking, if I was now diagnosed with a terminal illness,
knowing I was going to die soon, would I be okay with that. Sadly, I still
haven’t answered that question to myself.


I can relate to this feeling of being not quite sure how I really feel about death.

Like most people, I avoid applying the concept to myself. And I avoid dealing with it when it concerns anyone I love. Never quite mastered that one.

We seem to spend most of our lives avoiding the subject, especially when it applies to ourselves.

We all know that it is a “fact of life”, yet see it as an be-all and end-all. But as Davey Wavey said, we all die (in some way) everyday.

Hopefully, we remember to LIVE each day too!

The Landscape of our Lives

Imagine you are the Earth, as a whole.

Now imagine you are a sattelite in space, looking down upon the Earth (you).

You can see all of the Mountain Ranges, and the deep blue of the Oceans.

The cuts and crevices left by time, nature, circumstance.


Life is like that. People are like that.


We all have our highest peaks of accomplishments, and the depths of our unknown souls.

The scars left from years of neglect, avoidance, and pure dumb luck.

We have have the wrinkles of time that has marched across our skin.

We spend too many years, and too much money on things like therapy, skin cream, and barely necessary prescription drugs, often to "fix" things we could have prevented.

We covet the trophys we have won, the positions we hold, the person we like to think we are.
We cling to delusions that do not serve us well.
We want to rationalize decisions by using "prettier" words. Chocolate covered shit, is still shit.


Life is like that. The Earth is like that.


If we only gave the Earth the attention and respect we give our own vanity, well, you can figure it out.

And by the way, this is calling out me also, as it is never "all about" any one. It is all about
Everyone.

Inspiration from Left Field

I came across this (not sure where) and I think it really applies to our Country, our President, and each of us as individuals......

**

Creativity loves a problem, but it hates a lousy audience.

If everyone around you is sure the economy is tanking, that the end is near, that time is up and the company is headed for the tubes, it's almost impossible to find a creative solution.

Creativity changes the game, whatever game is being played. "We're going to run out of cash by the end of the year," is accurate unless you count creativity into the equation. Then the accurate statement is, "Under the current rules and assumptions, we're going to run out of cash..." Big difference.

Creativity demands exposure to market needs, and insulation from market fears. Give it some time to work, some support, some breathing room. That's when creativity has a chance to change the game.

**
I think a new kind of creativity will be required in areas like alternative fuels, healthcare reform, education reform, as well as numerous others. Instead of thinking outside the box, I think it is time to get rid of the box altogether. Radical? Maybe. Although there was a time when the world thought that it was radical, even impossible to think that the wall would (could) ever come down between East and West Germany.

Never underestimate the impossible.

Hope within the Younger Generation

I have a very close friend that is very active in local politics. He is about 13 years younger than I, and therefore falls into the category I affectionately refer to as "younger men". Or better put,
the Younger Generation. I know that a big part of where we "end up" once we emerge from this economic/global crisis lies in the hands of this Younger Generation.

It is easy, and reckless to stereotype the youth of today (and tomorrow) based on the nightly news reports of local robberies, shootings, and drop out rates. It is easy to do, until you come across something like I did today hidden within a MySpace friend request from a 53 year old woman from Maui, on behalf of her 8 year old son, Axil.

Once you see her/their page, and read the story, and watch the videos, hopefully you too will see the Hope of the next generations yet to come.

Here is the link (be sure and add her as a friend!) and the words to one of the songs that Axil sings in one of the videos.


***

www.myspace.com/worldpeacebefore2021

Here are the lyrics to “World Peace Before Two Thousand and One”

Let the Sun shine down.
Down on you.
Right through the pouring rain.
We know it can be done!
World Peace Before Two Thousand Twenty One..

Earth’s racial and religious tensions escalate each day Violence and terrorism..
Everyone is prey.
Democracy gone mad versus no human rights at all.
We all must work for peace now or the human race will fall.

Diseases growing stronger while morality just won’t keep.
Pollute the skies, rape the Earth, the price is getting steep.
Oppression in the cities, while the rich enjoy their greed.
A drive by shooting takes a life, now see the child bleed.

People put your hands together.
This message now must be sent.
The cries of war, cries of pain, starvation and corruption All must come to an end.

So let the Sun shine down upon you right through the pouring rain.
We know it can be done.
World Peace Before Two Thousand Twenty One.

Political attention feeds the symptoms not the cure.
While citizens go homeless and the workers become the poor.
Countries in disagreement while the innocent shed their lives.
These natural disasters should be opening our eyes!

People put your hands together this message now must be sent.
The cries of war, cries of pain, starvation and corruption All must come to an end.

So let the Sun shine down upon you right through the pouring rain.
We know it can be done.
World Peace Before 2021.

Now, take a look around at what's right from what's wrong.
We’ve got to keep believing and we’ve got to be strong!
So... People put your hands together.
This message, now must be sent
The cries of war, cries of pain, starvation and corruption All must come to an end.

So let the Sun shine down upon you right thru the pourin’ rain.
We've got to get together.
It doesn’t matter who’s to blame.
Just hold on to the faith and cry out what you believe.

We know it can be done!
World Peace Before Two Thousand Twenty One.

***
Thank You Axil, for feeding the fires of Hope that will surely help make America her best.

Share this. Hope. Nurture the next generations.........

Now that we know we CAN, We Must.........

After watching the President's address to Congress, I realized that our perspective needs to shift towards a re-learning of many things we have "always known".

1) Energy

We need to re-learn the How's and Why's of our consumtion, creation, and waste, if we are to leave a world that is livable for future generations.

2) Health Care

We need to re-learn how every individual's health and well-being affects us all on both an individual, as well as global level. From birth to death.

3) Education

We need to re-learn the importance of creating opportunities to compete on a global level in all areas of knowledge. And hold those responsible for educating in a much higher regard. We must encourage future generations of Americans to step up to the challeges that make them, and in return the rest of us, the best that we can be.

There are many other areas that need the same application of thought if we are to become, once again the country that we all know we are.

We must acknowledge, and address our short-comings in our caring for those that have served in our Military and come back to a home that doesn't give as much as it has recieved from their sacrifices.

We all know by now how "bad" it is. We all know by know how "great" we can be.

Now that we know we can, we must.

In my Wanderings........

These are assorted items, quotes, etc that I have come across, and have stuck with me.......
Not sure what that means, but.......


He is the sum of his parts:

Expensive cologne and cheap cigarettes
Wrinkled oxfords and razor burn
Mangled thoughts and perfect speech
A walking conundrum that has everyone convinced
He’s got it together
When in fact he’s falling apart
And there’s no king that would bother to put him back together again
But like a good boy he perseveres
Not with any goal in mind but rather like some drone
Cruising through life on auto-pilot
Too afraid to take the wheel, for fear of being blamed when the car crashes
As it inevitably will
And for some strange reason you wish you were him
You wish you didn’t have to care
Even though everyday he rolls out of bed screaming silently
His eyes burn with tears he won’t let fall
But still he drags out his pathetic existence in hopes that he might feel.

Something

***

The Bliss Of With

You have come to me out of antiquities

We have loved one another for generations
We have loved one another for centuries

You teach me to trust the voice of my voices
You teach me to believe my own believings
You touch the palpability of my possibilities

Together we reflect what our mirrors conceal
Together we upgrade the sun in our meridians

We remain open night and day to transcendence

You are incompletely disguised as a mortal
You are the eternal stranger I have always known

I saw your wings this morning I saw your wings this morning

James Broughton

***

"Peace cannot be kept by force. It can only be achieved by understanding."
-- Albert Einstein

When I was a kid, my mother owned and operated her own beauty salon, about 35 miles outside of Chicago, mostly for aged women with too much gossip to keep to themselves. Occassionally I would get dropped off at the salon, and have to wait a few hours for her to finish working. I would usually spend this time thumbing through the assorted magazines she had in her salon. Good Housekeeping, Redbook, People, etc. One day I picked up a magazine called AfterDark. An entertainment magazine mostly filled with reviews of broadway shows, nightclub acts, etc. In the back (Classified ads) there was an ad for the (Openly Gay) Marlin Beach Hotel in Fort Lauderdale. This was one of my first exposures to "Gay" anything. I was maybe 12 years old.

This was enough to get the wheels in my head spinning, wanting to know more about these other people like me. Like me except they were Out and talking about it, hell, ADVERTISING it!!!

Occasionally there would be a news item on regarding something gay, and I would cringe in my seat if Mom were watching the TV at the same time. Watching Dynasty with here was hard enough.

By the time I was 13, I was much better versed in what I thought were "All things Gay". I was starting to get the hang of it, or so I thought.

One night while watching the news, November 27,1978 to be exact, the news covered a story about a very vocal, very OUT there, very tender man being killed for just that. At 13, I unknowly listened to the eulogy of a hero. My first Gay hero, Harvey Milk. Oh my God, they KILL Gay people........so much for telling mom I liked boys.

In the almost 30 years since, I have watched alot of other heroes die, or be killed, because they were not understood. Of course you do not have to be gay to be misunderstood, just ask anyone in Israel or Gaza, but I digress.

As we all search for that elusive "Peace", as we all watch those with power try to force a kind of peace upon us (silence), it saddens me to know that we very often forget that the path to peace IS through understanding, not power.

So we "fight" on.

Whether it be Prop 8 in California, Amendment 2 in Florida, or when trying to get healthcare for those most in need, but least in ability, we must always remember, that Understanding, not Power, will get us there.

you might have wondered, but were afraid to ask.

(WebMD) Here are some things you might have wondered about your penis, but were afraid to ask.

No. 1: Your Penis Does Have a Mind of Its Own
You've probably noticed that your penis often does its own thing. You may
remember times when it was completely inappropriate to have an erection; and
yet you couldn't wish it away.
It's true that you have less command over your penis than body parts like your
arms and legs. That's because the penis answers to a part of the nervous system
that's not always under your conscious control. This is called the autonomic
nervous system, which also regulates heart rate and blood pressure.
Sexual arousal usually isn't voluntary. The conscious mind is complicit in it,
but a lot of sexual arousal goes on in the sympathetic nervous system. In
addition, impulses from the brain during the REM phase of sleep cause
erections, whether you're dreaming about sex or about a test you forgot to
study for. Heavy lifting or straining to have a bowel movement can also produce
an erection.
Just as the penis grows without your consent, sometimes it shrinks. "The
flaccid penis varies in size considerably within a given man," says Drogo
Montague, MD, a urologist at the Cleveland Clinic. Exposure to cold water or
air makes your penis shrink. That's a function of the sympathetic nervous
system.
Psychological stress also involves the sympathetic nervous system, and stress
has the same effect as a cold shower, Montague says. When you're relaxed and
feeling well, your flaccid penis looks bigger than when you're stressed out.
The penis is "kind of a barometer of the sympathetic nervous system," Montague
says. So the greeting, "How's it hanging?" is more apt than you might have
realized.

No. 2: Your Penis May Be a 'Grower' or a 'Show-er'
Among men, there is no consistent relationship between the size of the flaccid
penis and its full erect length.
In one study of 80 men, researchers found that increases from flaccid to erect
lengths ranged widely, from less than a quarter inch to 3.5 inches longer.
Whatever the clinical significance of these data may be, the locker-room
significance is considerable. You can't assume that a dude with a big limp
penis gets much bigger with an erection. And the guy whose penis looks tiny
could surprise you with a big erection.
An analysis of more than thousand measurements taken by sex researcher Alfred
Kinsey shows that shorter flaccid penises tend to gain about twice as much
length as longer flaccid penises.
A penis that doesn't gain much length with an erection has become known as a
"show-er," and a penis that gains a lot is said to be a "grower." These are not
medical terms, and there aren't scientifically established thresholds for
what's a show-er or a grower.
Kinsey's data suggest that most penises aren't extreme show-ers or growers.
About 12 percent of penises gained one-third or less of their total length with
an erection, and about 7 percent doubled in length when erect.

No. 3: Your Penis Is Shaped Like a Boomerang
Your penis is shaped like a boomerang. Just like you don't see all of a big oak
tree above ground, you don't see the root of your penis tucked up inside your
pelvis and attached to your pubic bone.
In an MRI picture, the penis looks distinctly boomerang-like, as noted by a
French researcher who studied men and women having sex inside an MRI scanner.
One method of surgical "penis enlargement" is to cut the ligament that holds
the root of the penis up inside the pelvis. This operation may give some men a
little extra length if more of the penis protrudes from the body, but there are
side effects. This ligament, called the suspensory ligament, makes an erection
sturdy. With that ligament cut, the erect penis loses its upward angle and it
wobbles at the base. The lack of sturdiness can lead to injury.

No. 4: You Can Break Your Penis
There is no "penis bone," but you can break your penis all the same. It's
called penile fracture, and it's not a subtle injury. When it happens, there's
"an audible pop or snap," Montague says. Then the penis turns black and blue.
And there's terrible pain.
Penile fracture is rare, and it typically happens to younger men because their
erections tend to be quite rigid.
Here's how to avoid penile fracture: don't use your penis too roughly. A common
way that penile fracture happens, Montague says, is when a man is thrusting too
hard and fast during sex, and slams into his partner's pubic bone. Also, a
woman who moves wildly while on top of a man during sex can break a man's
penis.
Peyronie's syndrome is a related condition that tends to show up more in older
men, Montague says. An older man's erection may not be as rigid, but still is
hard enough for sex. Over time, if the penis bends too much a certain way
during sex, small tears in the tissue can form scars, and the accumulated scar
tissue gives the penis an abnormally curved shape.
Not all penis curvature is a problem, however. "There is a lot of variability
in what normal is," Cummings says.

No. 5: Most Penises in the World Are Uncut
A report by the World Health Organization (WHO) and the Joint United Nations
Programme on HIV /AIDS (UNAIDS) estimates that worldwide only 30 percent of
males aged 15 and up are circumcised.
Rates vary greatly depending upon religion and nationality. Almost all Jewish
and Muslim males in the world have circumcised penises, and together they
account for about 70 percent of all circumcised males globally.
The United States has the highest proportion of males circumcised for
non-religious reasons. A whopping 75 percent of non-Jewish, non-Muslim American
men are circumcised. Compare that to Canada, where only 30% are. In the U.K.
it's 20 percent; in Australia it's merely 6 percent.
The practice of circumcising baby boys for medical and cosmetic reasons has
become controversial in the U.S. But recently the World Health Organization
(WHO) and the UUNAIDS recommended circumcision for adult men, based upon
evidence that men with circumcised penises have a lower risk of being infected
with HIV.
The CDC estimates that about 65 percent of all newborn boys get circumcised in
the U.S.

By Martin DownsReviewed by Louise Chang©2008 WebMD, Inc. All rights reserved.

Now you know, and did not even have to ask!

Getting out of line for the next iEverything

When you are discontent, you always want more, more, more. Your desire can never be satisfied. But when you practice contentment, you can say to yourself, 'Oh yes -- I already have everything that I really need.'

—The Dalai Lama

Recently my cell phone lost its ability to send text messages. Oh the Horror!!! Nope- I have come to find that I do not NEED to have the ability to text, albeit "convenient, it is not a necessity.

When you consider the fact that I have gone most of my life without benefit of a cell phone at all, living without texting is quite freeing.

I still get text messages, but if I choose to respond, I just call the person who sent the message. Much like I choose whether or not to answer, when someone calls me.

Got me thinking about what other "necessities" I do not really need......

02/10/09 Three Weeks - and still no "make up"

I suppose one of my favorite things about our new President is that he refuses to wear a mask, or mask anything we need to know with rhetoric or bullshit, as we have long become accustom to.

He has told us that not everything that we try to do to "fix" the economy is guaranteed to work the way it was intended. He admitted that he screwed up. No finger pointing, no deflection.
Accountability just like he campaigned with. He is leading by example. The question remains though, will we follow by example or will we keep doing, and living as we have in the past.

By now, in our own lives, we should know what works and what doesn't. We know we can't buy things beyond our means with the assumption that we will be able to afford it based on projected increases in our income. Those projections are not guaranteed.

As Whoopi would put it, "the Doo-Doo is rising fast", and it is disgusting to see some of our elected officials still sitting on their thumbs screaming "what about me??"

Whether we actually will need more money than they are fighting over now or not, they should pass the common items that everyone wants to see happen, and fight over the rest next month.
Or just pass the cumlulative of both bills, covering everyones bases.

But to drag their feet and continue bickering over whether we should continue the endowment for the Arts (who employ a helluva alot of people) or not is nothing short of typical bi-partisan bullshit.

Once again, beat out by the third world.....

"The State prohibits and punishes all forms of discrimination founded on the basis of sex, skin color, gender, age, sexual orientation and gender identity, origin, culture, nationality, citizenship, language, religious beliefs, ideology, political or philosophical affiliation."


-- Article 14.II: In the title 'Fundamental Rights and Guarantees' of the new Bolivian constitution. Once again, another "third world" country is surpassing the United States in human rights standards.

Contemplating my Staggering Stimulus Package

02/08/09.......and counting

We (Our Government) seem to be making "progress" in our (The Government) attempt to "save" our country (Us) from a "D" word (Depression). I think I understand a little more each day in what actions will create what results and therefore understand a lot more regarding why the Republicans are pushing for different actions than the Democrats as they want different results.

By using more money, or any money for "Tax Cuts"; i.e. reducing withholding tax, therefore giving You more "take-home pay" each week in your paycheck. Sounds great, huh?
It could be, or it could have an undesirable lack of stimulus to our economy.

Let's say they did reduce the withholding tax and you did get a little extra paper in your check.
Then you run down to Walmart to spend your hard earned money and buy a new flat screen (gotta have it!!). And of course you "charged it", knowing that you will have that same "few extra bucks" every time you get paid. Of course this keeps you in the same state of "check to check" living you have grown accustom to blaming the Government for.

Oh yeah, and it was made in Taiwan, whose economy was just stimulated, by you.

Flip the coin........

Let' say instead, they pumped more money into infrastructure, and created Government Jobs (Contracts). That would help slow the unemployment rates free fall, and those workers would in turn spend that money on everything; Food, clothes, rent, gas. Not just a flat screen. And not on a credit card. Hmmmm.

A bigger paycheck every week is great, unless you spend it without thinking.

Government jobs are great while they last but we sorely need some road and bridge work done.

So digesting all of that, I think my current view on it is that everything we do carries some risk.
Along with that risk comes responsibility and accountability.

Hello! I am talking about PERSONAL responsibility, and PERSONAL accountability.

We all want our actions to create the desired results. But we can't just sit back and hope for the best. We've settled for that for too long because we could always point a finger.

Whomever we point at, we always seem to forget that the majority of the time, we knowingly allowed actions by others, or inaction by ourselves, to negatively affect the desired result.

So maybe if the Republicans, the Democrats, or even better, All Americans took a minute to point in the mirror and accept their part in the American Quilt, we very well may become a great nation again.